Structure
As far as how often groups should meet up, that all depends on the group members themselves. Some groups like to meet every week, which several experienced small group leaders suggest, and some say that twice a month works well, depending again, on the group members. It sometimes seems that if a group meets every week, it is hard for the group leaders to come up with exciting material every single week and the lessons may become less interesting, or they may cause redundant or repeating conversations. On the contrary to that, however, meeting once a week keeps people in check better because of the accountability aspect. You are forced to look at your brothers and sisters in Christ in the eye every time you meet, as well as receiving counseling and encouragement from them. This can definitely help one become a sharpened piece of iron (see Proverbs 27:17).
Having small group twice a month has its pros and cons as well. For instance, nearly everyone has heard the quote, “absence makes the heart grow fonder?” It may not always seem the case with some people, but generally speaking, it is definitely easier to engage in smooth/good conversation by putting some distance in between meetings. It is also possible that having the small group twice a month (or every two weeks) doesn’t provide the members with enough encouragement or accountability. It might also not be an appropriate amount of time to get to know someone, as in, not enough time spent together in a certain span of time.
The book of Acts chapter two verses forty-two through forty-seven provide great insight of what any group, including a small group, should look like. “These believers were devoted to four ingredients essential for vibrant Christian life: nurture, worship, community and mission” (Barker 23). The nurturing aspect of the Christian small group shows a devotion of the members of the group a devotion of being taught in a healthy manner. In other words, the students should desire to better themselves in his or her spiritual life.
As one can see from the above mentioned passage of the Holy Scriptures, it is clear that an element of worship needs to be involved for a foundationally strong small group. Another way to say this would be that worship will take place if the small group is in the right place, spiritually speaking. From delving into His Word, we can get a better grasp of when and where and how He is active in our lives (even though He is active in every area of our lives and we might not see it). The point is, as we get in a closer relationship with Him, we naturally come to the point of praise. We see the goodness Christ exudes in our lives (not to mention for our lives) and we sing songs of praise, pray thanks, and bless His Name by telling of the great things He has done for us.
“All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need” (NIV Acts 2:44-45). Unity is clearly important in the eyes of God. When God condemned or praised Israel for instance, He did not place His focus on one or a small group of people for the most part, He mainly punished and spoke well of the Israelites as a nation. Clearly, His desires are that we carry one another’s burdens (see Galatians 6:2). With all of this in mind, a small group will function well if everyone is on the same page. If there is a broken wheel on a wagon, doesn’t it need to be fixed before the wagon can function again? In other words, a Christian small group community is being “devoted to one another based on the experience we share of God at work saving us from the “corrupt generation” around us (Acts 2:40 NIV) and knitting us into effective teams of change agents in the world” (Barker 25).
The final ingredient, of the four mentioned above, contains the mission of the Christian small group. It seems that there should be two aspects of the concept of mission concerning the small group. The first should be what mission the group as a whole is centered on, or rather, what the ongoing goal of the small group is overall. The mission of a small group will definitely vary, depending on the character of the individual members of the small group. For instance, if there are a lot of divorced members in the small group, the group’s mission might be focused on comforting those in the body of Christ who are going through such an experience. If not the problem of divorce in the church, the mission might place its energy on applying the words of Christ to everyday hardships, or possibly, the group’s mission might be focused on addictions and how to overcome them. In any event, there is a considerable amount of power provided by the group as a whole.
The second aspect of the concept of the mission of the small group contains the members of the small group on an individual level. This is where the group’s lesson, accountability and time together equips the individual to go out into the world and use the skills and knowledge and prayers he or she received at small group and use them in a practical manner. Either way, whether considering the mission orient individually or as a group, the goal should be to fulfill the law of Christ.
I have personally learned a great secret for the success of small groups, and that is without a doubt, food. Whatever your structure, add food to the mix, and make it excellent. This genuinely helps with excitement and keeps the metabolism going during the study which helps people want to engage more, and take ownership in such a group.
Interpersonal Communication and Conflict
As far as running into communication issues and conflict, a Biblical solution should be observed. What is the Biblical solution? Well, it is clearly the Golden Rule, but if one were to look at Matthew chapter 18 it is clear that there are sometimes complications between two people that require the cooperation of both people, and yet only one is willing to cooperate: “If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector” (NIV Matthew 18:15-17). Clearly, the solution is found in the Good Book.
This doesn’t necessarily speak of the cure for the topic of differences in interpersonal relationships. That, however, is probably because there isn’t an end-all cure for conflict in interpersonal relationships. A reason for this might be because there are so many different possible problems that can arise between group members. “Most will say conflict is caused by a clash between two people who can’t get along. But why can’t they get along? [These] five causes listed cover most of it—power struggle, contrasting perceptions, competing roles, separate aims and differing values. They are also the reasons we feel someone rubs us the wrong way” (Griffin and Griffin n. pag.). It is pretty much common knowledge that every person has someone who they just don’t seem to get along. Therefore, for different situations, different solutions must be applied. In any case however, love must always be applied.
Leadership Development
One of the unspoken goals of the leader of the Bible study has an underlying theme of disciples making disciples. In other words, without a doubt, the small group leader is a student himself or herself. It is hard to study a subject for other people and not learn anything about it. It seems that lawyers might be some of the smartest people in the world, because they must constantly study the fields that people are in, in order to get a better understanding on how to defend or prosecute. This is kind of the same way that small group leaders gain wisdom from study. The leader is teaching the other members of the small group information as well, which results in disciples making disciples.
Now with this in mind, it should be understood that while the group leader is making disciples, it is also recognized as forming leaders out of the small group members. In other words, the leader is developing leaders. This correlates with the mission aspect as mentioned above. It is where the leader ends the small group meeting and everyone leaves and is sent into the world, kind of like how Jesus sends His disciples into the world, telling them to “go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you” (NIV Matthew 28:19-20).
The idea behind all of this is that the goal in focus here is to create leaders who will continue the cycle of creating leaders. The Church, the body of Christ, is in fact a living organism, and needs to be fed, nurtured and taken care of and the like. If small groups were to stop, theoretically speaking, the body of Christ would be missing a nutrient that is necessary for a healthy establishment. Jesus ordained the small group when he said, “For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them” (NIV Matthew 18:20). It is clear that small groups are not only a gift from God, but also they are necessary for sustenance to the spiritual well-being of its members.
Equipping
This may seem like a no-brainer, but in actuality, this next subject comes with several questions. Such as, where do we begin when it comes to equipping? How do we as group members put what we are equipped with into action? What equips us?
Generally speaking, the last question seems rather easy. It is clear that the small group itself is what equips us. The different levels/aspects/experiences found within the small group forming together into one remote idea are that which is empowering and equipping.
It seems like the hardest thing to do for group members is to put what they learn into action. It is practically against human nature to change the way we do things. Clearly seen in the book of James, “everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (NIV James 1:19). In other words, if it wasn’t so hard to go against this (slow to listen, quick to speak and quick to become angry), James wouldn’t have had to feel the need to write on such things. It is clear that this is something that we must be mindful about in order for many of the small group meetings to be producing. James goes on: “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like” (NIV James 1:22-24; emphasis mine).
Conclusion
The subject material that good small group leaders take from the Bible is something that small group members must put into practice. The members, rather, the ears that hear the Word of God are to step out in faith and as James says, “do what it says.”
The ultimate goal is to be or to become equipped. The process of building a healthy small group in the local church not only provides small group members with the spiritual Armor of God, but the group meetings teach us how to put it on and take care of it, polish it and sharpen it (see Ephesians 6). Scripture, the heart of the small group, is what guides the leaders to lead, and the members to learn. “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work” (NIV 2 Timothy 3:16-17; emphasis mine). Scripture is that which helps us fit into the Armor of God, and as seen in the Timothy passage above, thoroughly equips us better our walk as Christians.
Works Cited
Jeffrey Arnold and Stephanie Black, The Big Book on Small Groups: (Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity Press, 1997, c1992).
Steve Barker, Good Things Come in Small Groups: The Dynamics of Good Group Life (Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity Press, 1997, c1985)
The Holy Bible: New International Version, electronic ed. (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1996, c1984).
Emory A. Griffin and Em Griffin, Getting Together : A Guide for Good Groups (Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity Press, 1997, c1982).
© Nace Howell, 2022
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